You can’t open any virtual window without news of war and what is happening in Ukraine. It’s tumultuous times and you can feel it all around you, people are scared – of what is happening and what it means for them. But in reality the only choice we have is this : Do you take the road of fear – or the road of love? Let me explain.
Taking the road of ♥️ doesn’t mean you do not care what is happening to Ukranians (and to Russians), on the contrary. You can feel compassion and do what is in your power to help. The question here might impose itself: What can you do to help? And at risk of being unpopular, putting a flag on a profile photo might have a limited effect. Not that I have tons of other activism things for you to do – I’m not saying that you have to jump into your car and go to the Ukrainian border and pick up refugees, although many people have, which is admirable. People are donating money and things and I guess supporting the cause on social media as they can. But here is a distinction and what I’ve realised recently: what we are living in virtual worlds, has little impact on our lived reality. You can post all the fine posts on Linkedin or Facebook, but what TRULY MATTERS is how you meet people in your everyday life.
In my self-imposed work isolation (I’m currently looking for new ways of filling my life with purposeful projects that can also pay the bills.. and resisting the word ‘work’) I’ve had the privilege to think, to distance myself of the everyday pains of the hamster wheel and wonder what a purposeful life looks like for me. And I keep coming back to the same things: being better at being kind, connect with people and contribute with hope and action for a better world. (Now, how does that translate into ‘work’? And does it have to?- that’s for another blog)
And then I found this: The Benefit Mindset. It’s funny, I don’t remember where it came from (probably one of those mindless scrolls on one of the social media feeds) but this is exactly how I feel – and probably also explains why I was at odds in the ‘Growth mindset’ being imposed on me at the Corporation – I had already moved on to the BENEFIT MINDSET without having words for it:
It is about opening your heart and focusing on why we do the things we do. It’s a theory that I connect strongly with. I read a quote the other day about everyone having their own traumas and dragging them with them through life, and I think that if we start to see the world differently, and try to understand why people do the things they do, with more compassion for each other, we might be able to transform our world so things like are happening today become unthinkable. I think it might actually be happening to force a change.
Many of the things we consider to be normal and healthy in today’s society are actually destructive and unhealthy, causing deep harms for ourselves, others and the world. Thus, rather than seeing todays disruption as a time to bunker down only to return to the same old ways of living and working, we can use this time to reflect on who we are and who we want to be as a society, and choose to transform ourselves and the world by living into the possibility of profound civilisation renewal.
-Ash Buchanan, the Benefit Mindset
What if this invasion serves to show that you actually cannot send (so young) people to battle anymore? I wonder how long the Russian soldiers will take orders that feel counter-intuitive to them? I do not believe that we live in times where self-sacrifice for a country without reflection can happen anymore. We are so connected (whether we like it or not) that an agressive action like this can only have disastrous consequences that we all follow in real time. What does it mean? And what can you do to help? As Jane Goodwill (Freudian slip: Goodall) would advice : Act locally. Show kindness. Take the road of the heart. If you stop long enough to listen to it, you will know what are the right things to do. Don’t let the sadness of the news drag you onto the road of fear… where the only possible actions seems to share devestation and cry for the victims of war. We can all act with more purposeful hearts … creating ripple effects that will be the only effective weapon against those that try to sow hatred and fear. By choosing the heart, and if we are many, we are already doing something.
Every nature, every modeled form, every creature
– MARY 2:2
exists in and with each other.
Saving the rep of Feminism 